Slit the Swiss roll lengthwise and unravel into a flat sheet. Lightly toast the teacakes and waffles. Arranging the tea cakes like "legs", place the unrolled Swiss roll on top as a "body", and then built upwards with alternating layers of chopped grapefruit segments, cheese and onion crisps and waffles. Decorate the top with half a grapefruit. Serve with an accompanying drink of premium cider poured into the hollowed-out other grapefruit half.
Andrew: "It's a bit of a vegetable"
Andy: "There is something distinct and unmistakable about the combination of cheese and onion crisps and grapefruit"
Al: "Exactly which sensation is it we're focusing on here, then?"